What’s the big deal about love and marriage and a baby carriage anyways? Why are people SO obsessed?
I think we, as a human race, are created for relationship. That doesn’t mean everyone has to get married, but whether you have 100 friends or 1 friend – you need someone and someone needs you.
Because of that, we desire to love and be loved. And often, that comes in the form of marriage. And as Christians, marriage is looked forward to, dreamt about, and often given the position of god in an individual’s life (more about that in a later post).
Here’s what I think:
Marriage shouldn’t be such a big deal!
I realize that sounds odd coming from me since all I write about is dating and marriage. But the reason I write about it is because it’s such a freaking HUGE deal to so many people, especially Christians. And it is a big deal, but not such a big deal. So how do you find that balance between pursuing your dream of marriage, yet not making it a bigger deal than it needs to be in your life?
On a scale between 1-10 (1 means marriage is no big deal, 10 means marriage is practically your god), how big of a deal is marriage in your life? Below are a couple of extreme examples to help you determine where you fall on that scale.
1: “I think I want to get married, but all the prospects out there are super lame. And I’m not ready to give up my freedom or my way – because marriage ties you down and forces you to give up everything! But you know…Ya…I want to get married.”
10: “O.M.G. I’m such a loser because I’m not dating.”
“I dream about my wedding day all the time. And pretty much every night I cry myself to sleep because that wedding date isn’t on the calendar yet.”
“I’m better than all y’all because I found my man…and our relationship is actually GOING SOMEWHERE! Now I just feel sorry for the rest of you.”
Marriage is beautiful. Marriage is a gift from God. Marriage is a partnership. Marriage is life-giving (should be). Marriage is fun. Marriage gives you constant companionship (even when sometimes you just want your own space). I WANT you to get married, if that’s what you want.
But when you’re obsessed with marriage, or maybe just obsessed with the opposite sex, you accidentally put marriage and the pursuit of marriage on a pedestal in your life. It doesn’t belong there. God belongs there. Pursue God first, and then pursue your dreams…including marriage.
But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. (Matthew 6:33 NIV)