Give Steady Eddy a Chance


I go to The City Church in Seattle, WA and Judah Smith is my pastor. He’s been telling single women for the past year or so to give Steady Eddy a chance. I like this advice and wish more Steady Eddy’s were dating. Most girls would say they’re open to dating or even marrying Steady Eddy, but it seems as if many of these guys are still single. Why?

First, let me describe who I think Steady Eddy is.

  • He’s steady! Haha. Ok, he’s a stable man with a stable job with stable emotions. He’s not going to blow up in anger one day because you pissed him off. He’s not going to cheat on you because he noticed a more beautiful woman checking him out.
  • He’s a little boring. At least he appears to be in comparison to other men with more flashy traits. He appears boring BECAUSE HE’S STEADY!

So why are many of these men still single?

  1. They aren’t interested in steady women. What’s wrong with Steady Betty??
    1. Maybe you’re open to Steady Eddy, but he’s not asking you out. Oftentimes, steady people are attracted to those a little (or a lot) less steady than them.
  2. They’re not that cute.
    1. Of course, this isn’t the case for all of them. But if a guy is steady and hot, or at least cute, he probably has a girlfriend (if he wants one). Sorry to the ‘not-as-cute Steady Eddy’s’ out there, but I think this is a true statement.
    2. Women (and men!)…if you prioritize hotness over steadiness, then good luck with your relationships. They’ll likely be volatile, passionate, crazy, and consistently end in failure. Obviously, there are always exceptions. But my advice is to mature before you’re 32 so that you can come to the conclusion that steadiness is more attractive than cuteness.
  3. They’re awkward.
    1. I don’t have much to say about this. Almost no positive trait can trump the awkwardness in a man or woman. (But I’m open to debate on this one if you’ve got ideas).
    2. The only thing I can think of is if a woman is a little awkward herself, then she’s more likely to be attracted to an awkward man. And “awkward” has SO many definitions - I guess we all have a little awkward in us.
  4. They’re boring.
    1. If you’re 30 and still attracted to the “bad boy,” it’s seriously time to grow up. Adventure is SO much more fun to have with someone who has a steady job, steady emotions, steady income, and steady love.
    2. Side note: if you’re 20 and want to get married now, but still like the “bad boy’s,” then the same advice can be applied to you: Grow Up (and sometimes that simply means you have to wait until you actually, grow up).
    3. Steady DOES NOT equal boring.

These are the 4 main reasons I think Steady Eddy’s are still single. Rarely, is the adjective “steady” on a woman’s list of attributes she is looking for. That’s not because she isn’t interested in a steady man, but because she assumes most men, and definitely her man, will be steady. But I think when we don’t intentionally prioritize important, yet somewhat boring traits like steadiness, kindness, and selflessness, then they can easily be overlooked by more flashy traits like hotness, money, charisma (which usually means an outgoing personality), and social status. It’s time to take an inventory of the Steady Eddy’s in your world and give them a chance.


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